Awful App Ads: Sims Free Play

Awful App Ads: Sims Free Play

We’re starting a new feature here at The Armchair Commentary. It’s called Awful App Ads.

I’ve seen a string of awful ads for apps that Facebook ‘suggests’ to me because I suppose they think that I might find what they’re peddling useful. Most of it is crap. The apps that aren’t complete drek seem pretty sketchy because they require you to log into them using Facebook. Data mining game tight.

The point of Facebook’s app suggestions is to get people to download a bunch of mostly useless apps so that Facebook and the app developers can make bank. What better way to do that than to create an ad that makes the user feel like they won’t be able to live without downloading the app in question.

The thing is, most of the apps that are being suggested are completely useless so whoever gets stuck with writing the ads for these apps has to create an ad that screams, “You need this! Download me!” Most of the ads miss the creative, enticing bit and are just awful. A few are a bit awkward and scary.

Thus, Awful App Suggestions on The Armchair Commentary.

Facebook recently suggested that I download The Sims Free Play app. This is the ad I saw:

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No. Just no. There is so much wrong here.

First of all, I feel awkward about seeing Sims kissing on my phone. I feel awkward about seeing Sims kiss in the actual game. I’ve survived a car accident, a 24-hour labor and delivery, and that horrible Saved by the Bell movie. I don’t need this in my life right now.

I also need to know how a black haired Sim and a reddish-brown haired Sim produced a baby Sim with sandy colored hair. Something ain’t right. Those Sims are gonna end up on Maury. Mark my words.

Finally, why in the world is the fact that the Sims can get married and make babies wherever I go a marketing point for this app? It sounds creepy. I’d rather not think about what my Sims are doing when my phone is locked.

This voyeuristic ad has me feeling some kind of way.

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